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Building on a Foundation of Honesty: How to Best Support Our Husband's Recovery

  When someone has been unfaithful, used lies and manipulation in order to continue behaviors without facing consequences, and spent a significant amount of time betraying themselves by behaving in ways that are inconsistent to their own values, honesty becomes extremely difficult . An alternate reality is created through justification and ideas of victimhood in order to continue to engage in these behaviors. These ideas and attitudes become so deeply ingrained that even when confronted with verifiable evidence of their inappropriate behaviors, the person will deny the evidence or communicate only enough information to cause the inquiry to stop. The foundation of the relationship is destroyed. Most betrayed partners, upon discovery of any kind of infidelity, rely upon their spouse's or boyfriend's description of what has occurred.  Sadly, up to this point in my work with partners, each one I have spoken to initially whole-heartedly believes the account which has been shared, ye

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